"Roller Coaster"
You control me.
You're a RULER, a DICTATOR,
an ASSHOLE, a RELATOR.
You're a SHOULDER, strong CHEST,
warm BREATH, wet KISS.
TIMID, I peek
you're NEVER there
My walls fall, BREAKING down,
and you are EVERYWHERE.
YOU taunt me from every CORNER.
I feel TEARS then I LAUGH
I feel ANGRY then SAD
Before I know what's happening
again, I LAUGH.
YOU have this hold
a grip so TIGHT
It's PAINFUL
It HURTS
It ACHES
It BURNS
Just when I think I'm DEAD.
It's COOL
It's REFRESHING
CALMING
HEALING
I shake my HEAD
and once again EVERYTHING
is NORMAL.
You're a RULER, a DICTATOR,
an ASSHOLE, a RELATOR.
You're a SHOULDER, strong CHEST,
warm BREATH, wet KISS.
I weaken for YOU.
-written by me. Ashley Lanford Berchekas 19 July 2012.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Me vs Me
Hello friends,
Unfortunately, I'm sad to say that the reason it has been so long since my last blog post is because I fell off of my get healthy train, but as of today I've re-boarded with a new partner. Yep, that's right, my hubby has finally decided to get on the train with me. It means a lot that he's making a life style change with me because it's extremely difficult to keep it up when you're doing it by yourself. I've been searching pinterest high and low for low calorie, low glycemic recipes. I'm trying to bring a variety of foods into our new lifestyle because I know the hubs will get very tired of eating the same things.If any of you have delicious low-cal or low glycemic recipes, please send them our way. (I prefer fairly simple recipes that don't take too long to prep and cook considering the limited amount of time we have for dinner, baths, and bed after work each day)
I've started taking a Zumba class 1 time a week at my dad's karate studio. It is so much fun!!! It's a really amazing workout without the feeling of it being a work out. I feel like I'm just dancing around having a great time with some amazing girls. My husband takes this opportunity on Wednesdays to do some weight training while watching his wife shake it and sweat to death (sexy huh). As of today, I've started Jillian Michael's 30 day shred, which I have been told has worked wonders for many people. I have high hopes, as I know my worst enemy through all of this is and always will be...ME.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again..I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. I know I will reach my goal one day, as my assistant manager always says "little by little" we'll get there, and now I have my biggest supporter on my team!!!!! So excited for this journey to begin again...
Unfortunately, I'm sad to say that the reason it has been so long since my last blog post is because I fell off of my get healthy train, but as of today I've re-boarded with a new partner. Yep, that's right, my hubby has finally decided to get on the train with me. It means a lot that he's making a life style change with me because it's extremely difficult to keep it up when you're doing it by yourself. I've been searching pinterest high and low for low calorie, low glycemic recipes. I'm trying to bring a variety of foods into our new lifestyle because I know the hubs will get very tired of eating the same things.If any of you have delicious low-cal or low glycemic recipes, please send them our way. (I prefer fairly simple recipes that don't take too long to prep and cook considering the limited amount of time we have for dinner, baths, and bed after work each day)
I've started taking a Zumba class 1 time a week at my dad's karate studio. It is so much fun!!! It's a really amazing workout without the feeling of it being a work out. I feel like I'm just dancing around having a great time with some amazing girls. My husband takes this opportunity on Wednesdays to do some weight training while watching his wife shake it and sweat to death (sexy huh). As of today, I've started Jillian Michael's 30 day shred, which I have been told has worked wonders for many people. I have high hopes, as I know my worst enemy through all of this is and always will be...ME.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again..I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. I know I will reach my goal one day, as my assistant manager always says "little by little" we'll get there, and now I have my biggest supporter on my team!!!!! So excited for this journey to begin again...
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
The first step is always the hardest
Hello friends!
It's been a short while since my last update, however LOTS has happened since then. My exercising has slowed unfortunately (my own fault) however, I've kicked it back in high gear!!! My eating healthy has continued, I feel I've done pretty well with it. My best friend is getting married next weekend and in 2 weeks time my dress is too big, so today I am taking it to get it altered, and imagine this, it's being taken IN not let OUT! What a sweet victory this is. My work pants are becoming dangerously close to falling off my rear-end through-out the day. Another sweet victory I might add! :)
On March 10th Bethany and I made a surprise trip to Auburn to visit Kelle for her birthday!! What a wonderful trip it was. Even though I worked all day and we didn't make it to Auburn until 9:00 that night, we had an amazing time, and the look on Kelle's face when we walked in was worth the entire craziness of the day! So, we had an awesome time with awesome friends, and a much needed mini-vacay away!!!
Oh and the whole reason for my blog post today was to share my new adventure with you all. Yes, another adventure. I took my first step into my weight-loss journey and my journey to financial freedom and those were the two hardest things I've ever done. Now, to assist in my getting out of debt, I have become an Independent Thirty-One Consultant. I'm just getting started and some days I wonder if I know enough people or if I'll be able to have enough parties to reach my goals, but my faith tells me it will all work out in the end. So here I am, booking parties, saving money, and gettin' healthy. This beautiful life has taught me so much already...and to think...I'm only 23 and a half!!!! Oh what a life this will be to tell my grandkids about someday :)
Sincerely,
The most blessed girl on the planet!!
(well that's how it feels)
Ps.-if your interested in hosting a party, purchasing items, or becoming a consultant like me, you can email me at aberchekas1447@att.net or check out my website www.mythirtyone.com/berchekas
It's been a short while since my last update, however LOTS has happened since then. My exercising has slowed unfortunately (my own fault) however, I've kicked it back in high gear!!! My eating healthy has continued, I feel I've done pretty well with it. My best friend is getting married next weekend and in 2 weeks time my dress is too big, so today I am taking it to get it altered, and imagine this, it's being taken IN not let OUT! What a sweet victory this is. My work pants are becoming dangerously close to falling off my rear-end through-out the day. Another sweet victory I might add! :)
On March 10th Bethany and I made a surprise trip to Auburn to visit Kelle for her birthday!! What a wonderful trip it was. Even though I worked all day and we didn't make it to Auburn until 9:00 that night, we had an amazing time, and the look on Kelle's face when we walked in was worth the entire craziness of the day! So, we had an awesome time with awesome friends, and a much needed mini-vacay away!!!
Oh and the whole reason for my blog post today was to share my new adventure with you all. Yes, another adventure. I took my first step into my weight-loss journey and my journey to financial freedom and those were the two hardest things I've ever done. Now, to assist in my getting out of debt, I have become an Independent Thirty-One Consultant. I'm just getting started and some days I wonder if I know enough people or if I'll be able to have enough parties to reach my goals, but my faith tells me it will all work out in the end. So here I am, booking parties, saving money, and gettin' healthy. This beautiful life has taught me so much already...and to think...I'm only 23 and a half!!!! Oh what a life this will be to tell my grandkids about someday :)
Sincerely,
The most blessed girl on the planet!!
(well that's how it feels)
Ps.-if your interested in hosting a party, purchasing items, or becoming a consultant like me, you can email me at aberchekas1447@att.net or check out my website www.mythirtyone.com/berchekas
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Lesson Learned
Hello Friends,
I have exciting news! I bought my first weight set today! I went out in search of an economical way to purchase small weights (3lbs, 5lbs). In my most un-favorite store, coughwalmartcough, I discovered a $30 dollar weight set by none other than, Jillian Michaels, whom I love! It included 2-3lbs weights, 2-5lbs weights, and 2 8-lbs weights nestled on a plastic tray for easy storage and transportation. It also included a Jillian Michaels DVD for weight lifting. I have not viewed the DVD, but I have used the 3lb weights, and I must say they are awesome. They're easy to hold onto, and for a beginner like me 3 lbs is perfect.
Now for the lesson learned...on Sunday I was a very bad girl! The hubby and I had been working around the house for most of the day. He changed the oil in my car, and we cleaned and packed up old clothes in Nick's room. Lunch time rolls around and neither of us feel like cooking. So, (here's the bad girl part) we drove down to McDonalds (i know you just cringed in your seat). I had a double cheeseburger and some fries. Delicious while it lasted...however I was so sick to my stomach all day yesterday, and even the sight of food made me feel sick. I know that the food wasn't bad because Jon ate the same thing, but after much thought I realized it had been more than 2 weeks since I've eaten fast food. I must admit I used to eat it probably twice a week. (Horrible I know, but I feel better when I let out the truth) So, McDonalds is the devil. You absolutely won't see me in that drive-thru probably EVER again! Lesson Learned.
With Love,
Ash
I have exciting news! I bought my first weight set today! I went out in search of an economical way to purchase small weights (3lbs, 5lbs). In my most un-favorite store, coughwalmartcough, I discovered a $30 dollar weight set by none other than, Jillian Michaels, whom I love! It included 2-3lbs weights, 2-5lbs weights, and 2 8-lbs weights nestled on a plastic tray for easy storage and transportation. It also included a Jillian Michaels DVD for weight lifting. I have not viewed the DVD, but I have used the 3lb weights, and I must say they are awesome. They're easy to hold onto, and for a beginner like me 3 lbs is perfect.
Now for the lesson learned...on Sunday I was a very bad girl! The hubby and I had been working around the house for most of the day. He changed the oil in my car, and we cleaned and packed up old clothes in Nick's room. Lunch time rolls around and neither of us feel like cooking. So, (here's the bad girl part) we drove down to McDonalds (i know you just cringed in your seat). I had a double cheeseburger and some fries. Delicious while it lasted...however I was so sick to my stomach all day yesterday, and even the sight of food made me feel sick. I know that the food wasn't bad because Jon ate the same thing, but after much thought I realized it had been more than 2 weeks since I've eaten fast food. I must admit I used to eat it probably twice a week. (Horrible I know, but I feel better when I let out the truth) So, McDonalds is the devil. You absolutely won't see me in that drive-thru probably EVER again! Lesson Learned.
With Love,
Ash
Sunday, March 4, 2012
My reasons to lose weight
These are in no particular order, just a few reasons why I want to lose weight...
1. So I can live a long life.
2. So I can see my son grow up.
3. So I can have another child without complications.
4. So I can look in the mirror and see a strong, beautiful woman.
5. So I can finally feel like my appearance matches my personality.
6. So I can finally stop being embarrassed when people look at me.
7. So I can walk into ANY clothing store and find something that fits.
8. So I can walk into a fast food restaurant and order a burger without getting laughed at.
9. So I can play with my child for more than 10 mins without losing my breath.
10. So I don't have to pay an arm and a leg for life insurance because my health is horrible.
11. So I will change the chain in the family and NOT get diabetes.
12. So I can have a strong heart.
13. So I can stop saying I know how it is when people point out their "kangaroo pouch"
14. So I can stop shopping at the fat girl stores.
15. So I can be another person's inspiration.
16. So I can save my own life and someone else's.
17. So I can say back when I used to be fat.
18. So I can finally be proud of myself.
19. So my husband can have an even more amazingly beautiful wife.
20. So I can prove to myself that I can do ANYTHING that I put my mind to.
This list will probably never be done...and I may continually add to it.
As always, thanks for the love and support.
Love,
Ash <3
1. So I can live a long life.
2. So I can see my son grow up.
3. So I can have another child without complications.
4. So I can look in the mirror and see a strong, beautiful woman.
5. So I can finally feel like my appearance matches my personality.
6. So I can finally stop being embarrassed when people look at me.
7. So I can walk into ANY clothing store and find something that fits.
8. So I can walk into a fast food restaurant and order a burger without getting laughed at.
9. So I can play with my child for more than 10 mins without losing my breath.
10. So I don't have to pay an arm and a leg for life insurance because my health is horrible.
11. So I will change the chain in the family and NOT get diabetes.
12. So I can have a strong heart.
13. So I can stop saying I know how it is when people point out their "kangaroo pouch"
14. So I can stop shopping at the fat girl stores.
15. So I can be another person's inspiration.
16. So I can save my own life and someone else's.
17. So I can say back when I used to be fat.
18. So I can finally be proud of myself.
19. So my husband can have an even more amazingly beautiful wife.
20. So I can prove to myself that I can do ANYTHING that I put my mind to.
This list will probably never be done...and I may continually add to it.
As always, thanks for the love and support.
Love,
Ash <3
Saturday, March 3, 2012
1 week in
Dear friends,
I have completed 1 full week of my new lifestyle, and I am in love with my results. I have lost a total of 3 lbs this week by eating better and exercising. I have a long way to go, but I must tell you I feel great. I've had more healthy meals then I've had non healthy meals. I've started Mad-Abs March, and I have successfully completed days 1, 2, and 3 with no problems. Today, I have on a pair of jeans that I haven't worn in MONTHS. I feel I'm losing "inches" more than pounds, and that is totally okay with me. I look forward to my work outs...I never thought I would ever be able to say that honestly, but when I don't work out I feel like I let myself down. There have been many times during a workout where I felt so tired that I didn't think I was going to make it, or every muscle was burning, but I just keep telling myself quitters never win, and I want to WIN this battle with my old self. No pain, No gain. Just thought I would give you all a little update on my progress. After one month goes by..I'll post some before pictures and then at 1 month I'll post current pictures. As always, thank you for your continued support.
With Love,
Ash
I have completed 1 full week of my new lifestyle, and I am in love with my results. I have lost a total of 3 lbs this week by eating better and exercising. I have a long way to go, but I must tell you I feel great. I've had more healthy meals then I've had non healthy meals. I've started Mad-Abs March, and I have successfully completed days 1, 2, and 3 with no problems. Today, I have on a pair of jeans that I haven't worn in MONTHS. I feel I'm losing "inches" more than pounds, and that is totally okay with me. I look forward to my work outs...I never thought I would ever be able to say that honestly, but when I don't work out I feel like I let myself down. There have been many times during a workout where I felt so tired that I didn't think I was going to make it, or every muscle was burning, but I just keep telling myself quitters never win, and I want to WIN this battle with my old self. No pain, No gain. Just thought I would give you all a little update on my progress. After one month goes by..I'll post some before pictures and then at 1 month I'll post current pictures. As always, thank you for your continued support.
With Love,
Ash
Monday, February 27, 2012
Royal Fat Adder
So, yesterday I decided that in order to meet my goals, I'm going to have to start eating healthy. By healthy I mean organic produce, lean meats, and NO I repeat NO quick easy convenient foods! On Wednesday (payday/grocery day) I will be making my first trip ever to Earthfare. If you have any tips or comments about Earthfare, please feel free to share them here. I would like to hear my friends' experiences with the place. I will admit, the thought of organic and healthy terrifies me because I've never lived like this before, so it is all new to me. In celebration of this new way of life, the hubby and I had 1 last terrible eating day. Yesterday, we went to Red Robin for lunch. We had an appetizer with onion rings and cheese sticks, then I ordered my favorite burger, the Royal Red Robin, of course accompanied by bottomless fries, and to finish out the terrible eating day, I had a medium cup of Better Batter ice cream from Maggie Moos (I know terrible is an understatement). Over the past couple of months I've been eating "better" but not great and Eating that Royal-Fat-Adder (Royal Red Robin) made me feel miserable for the bulk of yesterday and the bulk of today. All the starches and sugars made me super exhausted, and that my friends was the proof that I needed that this life-altering decision I have made is the correct one. :)
Saturday, February 25, 2012
because it has been a while.
Hello friends,
It has been quite a while since my last blog post. We've sold our house, bought a new one, gained a new niece, and celebrated our little one's third birthday! However, I decided to start blogging again because I've started a new journey. I call it my "because i'm tired of being fat" journey. I'm on a new path to become healthy. Of course, this also means losing weight. I've promised myself that I'm committed to changing my bad habits to good habits. I know that this road will not be easy, nor will it be short, and because I know that, I need my entire support group to stand beside me (as if I have to say that. You guys are amazing!).
I can be honest by saying that the root to my weight/health issues is ME. I doubt myself and my abilities to do certain things. I try to make myself "feel" better with food and lazy-ness. (Excuse my language) I had to have a heart to heart with myself and basically I said this, "Ashley it's time to get off your lazy ass, put down the snacks, and put your everything into something healthy and productive. It's time that you do something for you. And it's time that you become truly happy with your WHOLE self inside and out." After this pep talk with my inner me, I went out and bought myself an elliptical (with the help of my completely supportive and amazing hubby). I'm self-conscious about the gym and everyone staring, so I figured this was a way I could be comfortable and get healthy. I've downloaded the "my fitness pal" app on my droid. It keeps me accountable for my calorie intake. I have to log all food and drink that I consume for each meal and in between. It pretty much holds me accountable for my food and beverage choices and helps me realize which ones are good choices and which ones I should steer clear of.
The elliptical has been a huge hit. I'm on it at least 4 times a week. At first, I have started slowly 10 mins at a time, but just this week I've been able to make it through a 20 minute pre-set workout, and I am so proud of myself! I never thought that I would post something so personal as my weight on something so public, but I feel this is my way of owning up to the bad choices I have made for so many years. I also feel it will help my friends understand how important this is to me, and help to hold me accountable to reach my goals.
I can be honest by saying that the root to my weight/health issues is ME. I doubt myself and my abilities to do certain things. I try to make myself "feel" better with food and lazy-ness. (Excuse my language) I had to have a heart to heart with myself and basically I said this, "Ashley it's time to get off your lazy ass, put down the snacks, and put your everything into something healthy and productive. It's time that you do something for you. And it's time that you become truly happy with your WHOLE self inside and out." After this pep talk with my inner me, I went out and bought myself an elliptical (with the help of my completely supportive and amazing hubby). I'm self-conscious about the gym and everyone staring, so I figured this was a way I could be comfortable and get healthy. I've downloaded the "my fitness pal" app on my droid. It keeps me accountable for my calorie intake. I have to log all food and drink that I consume for each meal and in between. It pretty much holds me accountable for my food and beverage choices and helps me realize which ones are good choices and which ones I should steer clear of.
The elliptical has been a huge hit. I'm on it at least 4 times a week. At first, I have started slowly 10 mins at a time, but just this week I've been able to make it through a 20 minute pre-set workout, and I am so proud of myself! I never thought that I would post something so personal as my weight on something so public, but I feel this is my way of owning up to the bad choices I have made for so many years. I also feel it will help my friends understand how important this is to me, and help to hold me accountable to reach my goals.
I'll call today the start of my journey, February 25, 2012.
Current weight is 234.5 Pants size 16-18
Short term goal- 1 month from today 224 lbs
Long term goal- February 25, 2013 140 lbs
I know that I can do this. Let the journey begin.
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